April 27, 2007

Free Carbon Credits !!!

To address "global warming" and if you want to be considered "carbon neutral" and if you want to "feel good," you may pretend to offset your "carbon footprint" by obtaining "carbon credits or offsets," which are available at a price from Al Gore's own company. On the other hand, I like to try something before I buy it, and I like things that are free. Given that, Denny in Atlanta has shared a source that gives FREE CARBON OFFSETS. This could solve melting glaciers and all evils against nature by mankind.

Here's my carbon offset certificate! I now can leave the air conditioner running in my house all summer without destroying the Earth. I did my part.


Get your very own certificate suitable for framing from Free Carbon Offets (link)! Give some as presents, too! Won't your kids be excited on their birthdays to receive carbon offsets rather than video games? The wife would especially like this for your wedding anniversary. Trust me.

Sorry, Al. That's the way the free market works. The world is saved!

UPDATE: This is GM, normally I don't add to or change Woody's posts, but this is too important, we must save the world from Owlgores hot air which is heating up the planet. To do that, I have created our own Certificate of Carbon Offsets and placed it below this paragraph. To use, simply right click on the certificate, save it to your computer, print it, write in your name, date it, and take it to your nearest Garden Center. There, purchase an OAK TREE, pay for it in full and take it home and plant the tree. You will have done something for the children (hey, we can't let the Democrats be the only ones doing "it" for the children.). In fact, you can print as many as you want, then everytime you buy something green to plant in the garden, a container, the flowerbox or on the patio, you too will feel smug and superior.

Posted by Woody M. at April 27, 2007 10:00 AM | TrackBack

Hilarious! LOL!

I've got mine hanging in my cubicle.

Posted by DADvocate at April 27, 2007 11:00 AM

Carbon offsets are mostly intended for use by corporations and not individuals. The idea is actually more conservative than liberal... the hope is to create a market-based solution to green house gas emmissions. You may consider it to be an artificially created market but most markets are just that anyway.

And a free market does not mean that everything is "free." Although if you're willing to make health care free then maybe we can work out a deal on carbon offsets. ;)

Posted by e. nonee moose at April 27, 2007 11:18 AM

Moose, you and Woody REALLY need to take this vaudeville show on the road! ;-)


Posted by GM Roper at April 27, 2007 12:16 PM

Moose, I also note that you and Woody are not that far apart milage wise... you two really ought to get together and have a beer or at least a cup of coffee.

Posted by GM Roper at April 27, 2007 12:17 PM

Wow! I just claimed 1,000 credits but the G.M. Corner's certificate is good for 1,000,000!

Besides buying the oak tree, people can buy a rope swing "for the children" and tie it to a branch so that twenty-five years the tree will have grown and their kids can use it--unless we're all under water by then.

1,000,000 credits/offsets...amazing. We could have this problem licked in a week.

Posted by Woody at April 27, 2007 12:48 PM

George fixed the problem so I take this time to tell everyone how wonderful GM really is, one terrifc guy, a marvelous counselor, and all around good friend.

* * *

...and, a pretty good impersonator of the real Woody. ;-)

Posted by Woody at April 27, 2007 01:24 PM

And if they wont buy your carbon credits, you can always issue one of these:
Fatwah Certificate

I made it myself ;-)
Problem fixed curtesy of GM

Posted by Oyster at April 27, 2007 07:39 PM

A while back I created my own printable carbon credits... don't try and spend them at the grocery store, however!

Posted by Doug Ross at April 28, 2007 11:44 AM

Doug, now that is a great carbon credit certificate! However, can we get it in something other than small bills? Also, why can't I print the entire bill without some rulesforuse.org cutting it off? The Al Gore portrait sets it off.

Posted by Woody at April 28, 2007 05:14 PM

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