February 27, 2006

The "NEW" Peace Plan

My good friend Raven who writes at And Rightly So also writes at Southpark Republicans. She put up a recent post at SPR that is usually attributed to leftish Robin Williams. Now, a search on the internet of Robin Williams Plan yields many scoffs at the so called RWP but that doesn't matter. And, I suggest that it doesn't matter who came up with this. The plan is brilliant in concept, easy to implement and will absolutely work. (Insert wry grin here). Without further introduction, I hereby steal and publish The NEW Peace Plan:

1) The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini and the rest of them 'good old boys'. We will never "interfere" again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No more sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. France would welcome them.

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself, don't hide here. Asylum would not ever be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers.

5) No "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self sufficient energy wise. This will include developing non polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else.

8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere". They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides' most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if any anyway.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an island some place. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, it would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

9b) Use the buildings as replacement for the twin towers.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer.

Now, ain't that a winner of a plan.

"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'" -

Posted by GM Roper at February 27, 2006 07:24 AM | TrackBack

If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home baby.
"D" as in "deport?"

We could also tie the price of a bushel of wheat to the price of a barrel of oil. Yeah, I know that's not realistic, but I like envisioning the Arabs choosing to either drink their oil or buy food from us at amounts comparable to their gouging. Back in the 1960s and before OPEC, the prices of those two commodities were approximately the same.

Posted by Woody at February 27, 2006 08:10 AM

America benefits hugely from the import of skilled, ambitious and eager workers and experts from all regions of the world. Isolation and trade barriers were a great part of what caused the Great Depression. Trade and free movement of human resource is vital to America's growth -- what you propose would only destroy what we so cherish.

The fight Islamofacistism while maintaining free trade and inflow of human resources is the true challenge of our times. Drawing into our shells will not work. This is part of why Bush choose to go OUT and bring the battlefield to our enemies. You must hold the door wide open to your friends, even while you do your best to kill (not convert -- just kill) your enemies.

As we have not been attacked again sice 9/11, I would hazard that the Bush method has something going for it.

Time will tell if I am right.

Posted by Gordion at February 27, 2006 11:15 AM

Gordion, in case I didn't say it clear enough... the above was tongue in cheek. We cannot and will not isolate ourselves.

Posted by GM Roper at February 27, 2006 02:22 PM

Does anyone know if Robin Williams is aware that his name is tied (albeit falsely) to this truly "great" plan?

GM, I know it's tongue in cheek, but for most of the world - I rather believe - they operate on REALLY simple (as in simpleton) ideas/beliefs. Many years ago (this sounds like the opening for Star Wars), America was respected because our potential enemies knew that if they did bad things....even worse things would accure to them.

Maybe we are getting too complex and sophisticated, ya' think? It has to do with all sorts of people operating in parallel universes. What various people, even within the same country, believe can be vastly different. The public can be swayed dramatically by either governments or the media...both if the government is a dictatorship.

Hmm. I will let the reader attempt to discern my point(s).

Posted by Tad at February 28, 2006 12:26 PM

South Park Republicans - Republicans who can't grasp the concept that South Park is satire.

Posted by E. Nonee Moose at March 1, 2006 04:12 PM

Actually Moose, had you gone to SPR you would have realized that those of us at SPR are deeply embedded in satire/comedy. So, who can't grasp what?

Posted by GM Roper at March 1, 2006 06:02 PM

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