Etiquette - Helping the Left Out of the Gutter

In recent days, unpleasant comments were cast our way, causing one to realize that some visitors from the left were ignorant of social graces and rules of etiquette. It is not unexpected nor are they to blame. Country clubs and cotillions, where these social traits are honed, were missing in their neighborhoods, and there were inadequate government programs to teach manners. To help those on the left, I will offer selections from a lesson in dinner etiquette, as taken from The Business Forum. Proper etiquette does not go unnoticed , it is often rewarded with positions that are the envy of the 'hood, and it provides lessons for discussions on this site. A link is provided for the entire study, and I encourage you to read it.

The Etiquette of Formal & Business Dining

• If there is a coat check attendant or a footman, then the proper procedure is for the gentleman to first hand his hat, (which should have been removed before he entered the foyer), along with his gloves and cane or umbrella (rolled and buttoned), if he is carrying them, to the attendant.

• Only call a waiter or server to help you during a formal function if you absolutely have to and, an escorted lady should never do so; she should instead ask her escort to do it for her.

• At the best functions and in the finest restaurants your wine will be served in the proper glass. The most embarrassing incident can take place if you or even your escort, not knowing this, asks if he or she can have a "bigger" or a "smaller" glass.

• One should never use one's fingers at any formal dining experience, (except for moving pieces of bread to your mouth) unless a delicacy is served which it is impossible to eat unless one uses one's fingers. ...these days it is more often than not frowned upon as boorish behavior.

• It is always inappropriate to ask the waiter for a "doggy bag" to take home the leftovers when you are a guest at either a formal function or at a good restaurant. If the waiter suggests you can take home the leftovers, decline with a polite but firm, "Thank you, but no".

• If food gets between your teeth while you are eating, and you are not able to remove it with your tongue, ask the waiter to bring you a toothpick (if you did not remember to bring one with you) then lower your face until you are looking into your lap and cover your mouth with your free hand to use the toothpick.

• And finally, and most importantly:
Always remember that a formal function is no place for preaching or verbally bullying others, and that profanity of any kind, or argument, or loud or lewd behavior in any form is also frowned upon in polite company. Dignity will never go out of style.

Of course, all of our regular readers are probably laughing and wondering who doesn't already know these things. Don't be surprised at the number of common people, i.e., those on the left, who have not been trained in social areas. Therefore, I hope this information helps them for the next business dinner--and, to learn the proper style for discussions.

We will continue the lessons in another series titled "Deferring to the Intellect and Reasoning of Conservatives."