October 15, 2005
Global Warming Update!
Causes of so called global warming have run rampant. Some claim that it is because of human intervention. This is easy to disprove in-as-much as we can prove that the Polar Ice Cap from the last Ice Age has been shrinking long before mankind (womankind? personskind? peoplekind? -- come on you PC'ers, what term should we use?) came on the scene in numbers enough to affect the ice. Proof of that is here and here and here as supplied by our intrepid Woody (He made me use that word, I would have just called him our diligently scientific Woody...gmr).
Yet, despite Woody's attempts to get to the bottom of the urban legend of global warming, the philistines persist. The ballyhoo continues. So, it is a fact that temperatures have been rising since around the early 1800's, and it is also a fact that the occupation of Piracy has significantly declined since that time. Perhaps there is a connection. After all, with all the interests in "piracy" these days, from movies to blogs to language (and even more language) the connection between a decrease in the number of pirate's and the increase in temperature can no longer be ignored by the scientific community.
In the early 1800's (1820 to be scientifically accurate according to our accumulated evidence) the number of active pirates was around 35,000. By the end of the twenty century that number had decreased substantially to around 17, give or take a couple of hundred. Coupled with that knowledge, it is obvious that mean global temperatures had also changed from around 14.25 degrees Centigrade to around 15.9 degrees Centigrade. The following graph supplied (albeit unknowingly) by the fine blog Mish Mash by Ryan Shea Cannot be denied.
As Ryan says, "Draw Your Own Conclusions." Furthermore, as William Teach says, "Arrrrgggghhhh," ignore the evidence at your own peril.
A tip of the GM Chapeaux to Hatless in Hattiesburg
Posted by GM Roper at October 15, 2005 08:52 AM | TrackBack"Global Warming" appeared, again this week, on the front pages of the Washington Post. I look for Hillary to use the so-called issue in her campaign. Just a hunch on my part.
Could there be a graph made which shows that global warming occurs as the number of politicians proliferates? Lot of hot air spewed forth from that source!
Posted by Always On Watch at October 15, 2005 11:55 AM
That graph is really scary, particularly if you notice the non-linearity of the pirates scale. It's obvious --if we wipe out most or all of the remaining pirates, we'll all be "cooked"!
Newest reports, however, give hope that a cold wave may be on the way, in light of the reports of increasing pirate activity in the South Pacific.
I wonder if anyone has looked at decreases in horse ownership or in the number of manual typewriters as causes of global warming.
However, I think the most promising approach would be to compare the number of PhD degrees granted per year as a function of mean global temperature. (Of course, we'd have to control for the number of trees slain in writing and defending these PhD theses, as well as for changes in hot air production.)
Posted by civil truth at October 15, 2005 12:08 PM
CT, AOW, I think you have both hit on something. I'll propose these lines of research the next time I give the Keynote Address at the National Academy of Sciences.
Will that do?
Posted by GM Roper at October 15, 2005 12:46 PM
There is a direct correlation between "scientists" claiming global warming and the number of government grants offered to them to study the problem.
If we accept the pirate analysis, then we can end global warming if just rename looters to pirates. If we did that for New Orleans alone, we might enter another glacial period.
Posted by Woody at October 15, 2005 06:02 PM
GM,
LOL! Yes, that will do very nicely.
Posted by Always On Watch at October 15, 2005 09:35 PM
If we only would have the world body declare beans a banned (or controlled) substance, we could solve the problem in one fell swoop. I have decreased the amount of beans I serve in my house and as a result my air conditioner has performed substantially better, using fewer fossil fuels in the process. Not to mention having to change filters less often.
And GM, consider yourself lucky with Woody's demands in using the title "Intrepid" to precede his name. My husband makes me call him "Oh, Master of My Universe".
Things could be worse.
Posted by Oyster at October 16, 2005 09:46 AM
Couldn't it be shown that the number of scientists has also increased in correlation to global temperature? The same could be said of lawyers and politicians, no?
Perhaps we need fewer of them...
Posted by Katie's Dad at October 17, 2005 10:48 AM
Who are the seventeen or so pirates today and what kind are they?
However, if we consider pirated software and pirated music, then we're going to have a frozen planet.
Posted by Woody at October 17, 2005 04:54 PM
Only 17 Pirates left? Maybe that explains Pittsburgh's declining fortunes the past few years...
Posted by civil truth at October 17, 2005 08:34 PM
Clarification: I meant to say "Pittsburgh's declining fortunes in baseball..."
Posted by civil truth at October 18, 2005 01:29 AM
More good news on global warming, courtesy of EU Rota which reports that piracy is alive and well off the coast of Somalia complete with a graph that should look familiar to you sharp-eyed readers of GM's Corner.
Beat the rush -- stock up on wood and wool coats now.
Posted by civil truth at October 25, 2005 05:21 PM
