I'm not sure why I find this so funny. But I do!

Hate to see their water bill after 30 days of this.

A tip 'O The GM Derby to Wise Bread

Posted at 02:37 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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For all of our rich readers, you know who you are, and those who think that only the U.S. has an immigration problem....

Switzerland, which has attracted millionaires from Ikea founder Ingvar Kamprad to ex-Formula One champion Michael Schumacher, may raise taxes on rich foreigners after French singer Johnny Hallyday's move to the Alpine nation sparked criticism on both sides of the Franco-Swiss border.

On Jan. 9, Leuthard launched a Swiss debate by saying the current system was discriminatory.... Montebourg stepped up the tone...by saying ``the paradise for the financial aristocracy in Switzerland'' was ``hell for all working people.''

Maybe Switzerland needs a border wall along the Alps to keep those rich people from sneaking across. They're making harder to find a good place to stash away milllions of dollars. But, I'll trade our immigration problem for theirs.

From TaxProf Blog

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I'm sincerely worried about global warming and the melting glaciers, which we have been told is the result of human carbon emissions. We must do something to stop this ice recession and reverse a 14,000 year pattern, that we foolishly used to think was a natural occurrence after the last glacial period.

Therefore, I am announcing a plan, eligible for federal grants, I hope, to rebuilt the glaciers! We will use ice cubes donated by American people and we will show the world that we care.

Here's how it works!

Step 1: Freeze a tray of ice.
Step 2: Take the ice out of the tray and put it in a large envelope.
Step 3: Mail the envelope to our collection station in McAllen, Texas. (G.M. has the address.)

From there, we will put the ice cubes together and send them north to rebuild the glaciers that have retreated soley due to mankind's neglect of Mother Earth. We need to treat our mother better.

It's as simple as that!

If you cannot mail the ice cubes but want to make a financial contribution, then mail $50 to our collection station in Atlanta, Georgia (I know that address), and we will make an ice cube for you and will inscribe your name on it, just like they do bricks in parks.

If someone sends me $50,000, then I will name an entire glacier for you! But, we will accept any contributions for lesser amounts.

Don't waste your money buying those doo-wop CD's to support public television. Send it to a cause that makes a difference! In fact, you may be able to take a deduction for the cost of the ice as a charitable contribution on your tax return! Call it a gift of a frozen asset.

We need a name for this program--maybe one that is an acronym. Something like ICE or International Climate Effort. What do you think?!

Bloggers, spread the word! We'll have a multi-level marketing program that can make you rich if you sign up early and freeze out your competitors. Ha Ha.

Take this as seriously as I do. To paraphrase John Lennon, give ice a chance!

Posted at 11:00 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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This could come in handy while taking part in those long protests in the hot sun. But, this innovation isn't just for them. It's for the rest of us who may happen to get within smelling distance.

Self-cleaning fabrics could revolutionize the sport apparel industry. The technology, created by scientists working for the U.S. Air Force, has already been used to create t-shirts and underwear that can be worn hygenically for weeks without washing.

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Just think...BVD's, torn blue jeans, and T-shirts of Che Guevara that rarely need cleaning--as though they wash much, anyway.

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We can all rest safer now that this sneaky criminal has been apprehended.

Hard up for cash, Daniel Brown donned a ski mask and jacket, armed himself with a handle from a hydraulic floor jack and made the 10-foot hike next door to his grandfather's home at about 1:30 p.m. Tuesday, said Detective Kyle Wilson.

"There's a woman that lives there with his grandpa. He said, 'Sit down, Bernice.' Then he goes to his grandpa's room and he says, 'This is a robbery, I need your money, and I mean it, Pa-Paw,' " Wilson said.

Walter Brown was lying in bed, Wilson said.

"So he grabs Pa-Paw's britches off the chair. The wallet was in there. He got out to the kitchen, which is in the next room, and his Pa-Paw tackled him. There was a scuffle, and he hit his Pa-Paw in the head with the handle," Wilson said.

While Walter Brown picked up the phone to call 911, Daniel Brown went back to his own home, leaving a trail — the pants, billfold, $5 and the handle — between the two houses.

How did they ever recognize him behind that ski mask? Surely, he had to be originally from Mississippi or Arkansas.

Posted at 11:50 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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This has nothing to do with anything except that it's pretty amazing. Watch this short clip in which a guy named Alexander Overwijk draws a perfect freehand circle on a blackboard in less than a second. It would take me at least twice that long. (Click space below.)

From CollegeHumor

Posted at 09:50 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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A blonde says to her boyfriend, "Please help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster." Her boyfriend decides to help with the puzzle. She shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster." He then takes her hand and says, with a deep sigh, "Secondly, let's put all these Corn Flakes back in the box."

Via Denny

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I found this story somewhat amusing and realized how it can reflect the difference in how different groups perceive the world. Read the story and I'll explain more at the end.

Begin Story

Tandem Writing Assignment
The following is a true story (True? I doubt it, but who cares.) received from an English professor.

You know that book "Men are from Mars, Women from Venus"? Well, here's a prime example of that. This assignment was actually turned in by two of my English students: Rebecca (last name deleted) and Gary (last name deleted).

First, the Assignment:

English 44A
SMU
Creative Writing
Prof. Miller

In-Class Assignment for Wednesday:
Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will then write the first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another paragraph to the story. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back and forth.

Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached.

And now, the Assignment as submitted by Rebecca & Gary: more...

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