November 24, 2007

The "I Trust Hillary" Chronicles

Joe Ward had a problem that no one should go through, though thousands do.  He had a desperately ill kid who needed a bone marrow transplant and well, watch the video...

Now, I for one am glad that Joe's son got the transplant.  I'm less delighted that the hospital "absorbed" the costs, because after all, those costs will be borne by someone else whether through higher costs for medications, higher fees for the use of surgical suites etc.  Hospitals may be "not for profit" but they are not perpetual losers either.  So, with that in mind, I started searching for other people that Hillary may (or may not) have helped and the list is amazing.

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Hello, my name is Susan McDougal.  I had been spending time in a Federal lockup and wanted to be home with my family so I could bake cookies.  The Warden said "Ain't gonna happen."  So I turned to Hillary Clinton.  She called back the next day and said that the prison would absorb the rest of the sentence.  Thank you Hillary, I'll trust you with all of my future legal problems.

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Hi there!  My name is Marc Rich.  Not too long ago, I had to leave home because of some questionable dealings with the IRS and some businesses I directed.  I wanted to return, but there was just no way.  So, I called Hillary.  She called back the next day and said that the United States Government would absorb the costs associated with me having to leave the country.  Hillary gets my vote for president and I think I'll donate some spare change to the Clinton Library while I'm at it.  For those of you that don't think you can trust Hillary, I trusted her with my freedom and she came through.

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Good Morning America, My name is Wolf Blitzer.  Just prior to the last Democratic Debate, I was accused of planning to throw softball questions to candidate Clinton.  My feelings were very hurt by this as I feel that I am a really tough questioner.  I called Hillary's campaign to complain about the harsh treatment I was getting, and she called back the next day and told me not to worry.  CNN would absorb a lot of criticism for too large a garden and too many plants and I would be dropped from the spotlight.  Wow, am I glad I called Hillary!  Some of you out there may not trust this great lady, but I trusted her with my reputation as a tough newsman  and I'm glad I did.

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Hello, my name is well, you really don't need to know my name, I'll just tell you that I was one of America's sexiest presidents.  Not too many years ago, I had problems with a young woman who alleged that she had inappropriate sex with me.  Well, I'm going to say this for the last time.  I did not have... Oh, sorry, wrong speech. 

I called Hillary to complain about all the criticism I was getting and she said not to worry.  She called back the next day and said that the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy would absorb all the vitriol and that my Party would hold me up as a president of peace and prosperity.  Thanks Hillary, I'll vote for you.

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My Name is Hillary Clinton and I approve of the above messages.  America's fertilizer business will absorb all the bull shit produced by these ads.

H/T to Ann Althouse via Glenn Reynolds

Posted at 11:38 AM | Comments (25) | Add Comment
Post contains 589 words, total size 4 kb.

1 I wonder if America can absorb all the fertilizer she would spew, should she be elected president.

Posted by: Ogre at Saturday, November 24 2007 01:05 PM (T/81v)

2 Beautiful!!!

Posted by: Faultline USA at Saturday, November 24 2007 01:17 PM (6QQh+)

3 That brought tears to my eyes...NOT!

You know, what would happen if she received calls from say, 5000 bloggers that needed help paying a medical bill? 

Just saying...

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